An appropriate explanation to those who have never lost

a loved one: 
"I am sure that many people question why people 
are putting memorial pages to their siblings and loved ones on the world wide web. To some it may even seem unhealthy and inappropriate. It is of course a way to remember our loved ones, but it is more than that. The only help a person can find when they are grieving a loss of a siblings, is in the company of another who fully understands that loss. This Grief is a total devastation of us and everything our life has been. It is horrifying enough to lose a siblings or loved one, But
Sometimes by sharing our thoughts we are able to give and receive comfort and help.   For some of us it is a way to say goobye.

If our words help even one person who has lost a siblings or even a loved one.....it is important, and does deserve a place on the web.  The internet is is the best way to reach out and touch those who are grieving and need a little support and comfort we can offer each other.

This page is dedicated to my brother John, who we lost so suddenly we didn't have time to say goodbye or tell him how much we love him. But then...  you never do, when it happens it happens and they are gone forever.

My brother, John lived  a about 6 hours away from me and I regret so much that we grew apart. which it wasn't any doing on either of our parts, It was just that as we both grew up  the family seemed, to grow apart. we all had our own lives to attend to now, We all had kids of our owns and lived in different states. Had so many different things going on at once, Not at all like when we were kids, Where we were each other lives.

 I wish that I would have called more often or visited him more, I wish I would have tried harder to let him know how much he meant to me,   But you never know what god has in store for you, I think we all are guilty of taking our loved ones for granted. Always thinking they will always be there, but they won't. 

If his death has taught me anything, it is to keep  all of my brothers and sisters  that I have left close to my heart. To work past the disagreements that we may have had in the past  To let each one of them know how much I love them, As well as all the other loved ones  I hold dear in my life, and never let any of them go cause in a blink of an eye they can be gone too. 

 I remember something he told me the last time I spoke with him, it was four years ago, when I got married, I called him to invite him to my wedding and we talked for a few hours and right before we hung up he said to me, You know something sis? And he said...

 who we were back then.....Is not necessarily who we are today. At the time I didn't realize what he meant by the comment until after he passed, He was telling me to forget the past and enjoy having all of our family together again

John was my oldest brother for 35 years,  Am I suppose to simply just forget that? No, we Can't, we just simply have to accept it and try to go on with our lives. easier said then done,

They say to work passed it and go on, for that's what he would have wanted you to do. I know John wouldn't want us to grieve, but it's so hard not to. I have a big hole right in the middle of my heart that is so raw and empty, I try to fill it with all the memories I have of him, All the fun times we had growing up. But it's just not the same as actually having him here with us.

I thought of John often, before he passed, But now that he is really gone and as it starts to sink in more and more each day...I  know that  there is not a day that goes by that I don't think of him, or see something that reminds me of him. I see him in the sky, the  trees,  And I can especially see him in the eyes of his only child, also named Jonathan. Everywhere I look I can see him,   

 If you were one of the fortunate ones to have ever meet John, then you know what kind of a person he was. Once he touched your life with his presence he also touched your heart with so much love. I love you Big Brother! And you will always be in my heart.